


For Whom The Bell Tolls

by NostalgicUncertainty



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Demon Blood Addiction, F/M, Reader Insert
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-03
Updated: 2018-02-03
Packaged: 2019-03-13 03:22:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,331
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13561674
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NostalgicUncertainty/pseuds/NostalgicUncertainty
Summary: You die on a hunt and go to hell- only to be miraculously brought back 6 Earth months/60 hell years later. Sam and Dean are stoked, but are you the same or has hell turned you into someone else?





	For Whom The Bell Tolls

You’ve been sneaking out almost every other night since you’ve been back from hell. Being much sneakier and smarter now- you know just how to fly under Sam and Dean’s radar, or so you  _think._

The Winchesters have been onto you for a few days now. Dean had been ready to roll and follow you the second he sensed something was off, but Sam stopped him thinking they needed to give her space. After all, the boys more than anyone knew how these things went. Going to hell and back ain’t ever been an easy feat, and you had been so new to the life too.

Every fiber in Dean’s body told him to go out and find out what you were up to, but he stayed in place. Understanding where his younger brother was coming from. Hell still haunts him to this day, he know how it feels.

Until one night, that all changed.

It was cold out, the chilly air bit at your skin as you moved the covers off your body. Slow and steady, trying your hardest not to stir more than you would changing positions. Sam was right next to you on the twin bed. While Dean snored in his own on the other side of the tiny motel room.

The lights from the barely covered window danced across the room. You wanted to slip out of bed as quickly as possible now- like ripping out a band-aid. Knowing that if you stayed too long in this upright position, it would catch either or worse  _both_ of the hunters’ attention. Their senses were tuned to perfection, a freakin’ hamster tip toeing on a cloud would wake them up for fuck’s sake.

Although this isn’t your first time doing this, you felt glued to the bed. You couldn’t move, your heart was beating out of your chest. Then it hit you.

It’s not just the fear of getting caught- you  _need_ it. You haven’t satiated the beast in weeks and now every nerve in your body is on edge. Each breath pushing you closer to the edge.

You need it and you need it _now_.

Next thing you know, your legs are dangling off the bed. You lean further down shivering as your feet meet the icy floor.

You won’t make it if you try to go out and hunt your way to your fix. Only one thing left for you to do now- the emergency stash.

A snore higher than the others startles you out of your thoughts. You hear Dean’s breath even out again shortly after and your shoulders sag in relief, until you feel the bed stir.

 _Shit. Sam_.

You sneak a look at him through your peripheral vision and he’s still fast asleep.

_Thank God._

That was the last straw for you as you sprung into action to the direction of the bathroom.

Making sure the light is off so you don’t blind the sleeping boys, you step in and only flip the light switch on once the door is nearly closed.

You let out the breath you’ve been holding- you made it. Then you take out the tiny bottle you bought from a Sephora store from the bottom of the deep pockets of your fluffy pajama pants. The container was for perfume or moisturizer, but that’s not what it was currently being used for.  

Your hands trembled as you unscrewed the cap and brought the deep red bottle to your lips and tipped it back with zero hesitation. The second the crimson liquid hit your tongue you felt an unmistakable and irreplaceable surge of power rush through your bloodstream.

This was wrong, _so so_  wrong. You were well aware, but it was too late. You were too far gone, in way too deep.

_Knock, knock_

You froze with blood on your lips and bottle clenched tightly in your hand.

“Y/N? You alright in there?”  

“Yeah, Sam. I’m good.” you replied, voice shaky. Cringing knowing how unconvincing you sounded.

Sam on the other side of the door was sure something was wrong. He had been awake the whole time you were sitting up thinking and then sneaking to the bathroom.

A voice in the back of his head constantly nagged at him that this was somehow related to your late night secret trips.

You frantically put away the bottle back in your pocket and then walk to the mirror leaning into the sink, and move to wipe the blood on your lips that had dripped down to your chin.

That’s when the door clicked open making you jump, the motel didn’t have locks. Her head automatically faced the door where Sam stood with soft, concerned eyes that turned into confusion and alarm.

“What happened?” His voice rang out as he barged in to examine your face.

You look down ashamed unable to meet Sam’s questioning gaze.

His fingers gently gripped the side of your face and your chin as he examined the blood. When he picked up on the blood leading into your lips his heart stopped, he raised your top lip slightly to check your teeth and his suspicions proved to be correct, dauntingly correct.

“Y/N… No, not  _this_ , not  _you_ ,” Sam brokenly whispered.

Tears welled up in your eyes and you sniffed them back.

“I’m sorry, Sam.”

“Why?”

You hung your head tears now freely rolling down your skin.

Sam raised your face again, hands cupping your cheeks.

“Why didn’t you come to me? You knew I’d understand,” he pressed.

You shook her head, “I couldn’t. I couldn’t see you break like this. I never wanted you to know.”

Sam’s eyes shone with disappointment and guilt. You knew he blamed himself for this, but you didn’t blame anyone but yourself.

“Where?” he asserted in a low volume.

You blinked.

“The rest. Where is it?” he relented louder now.

You reached into your pocket again and pulled out the bottle that had a tiny bit of blood left in it, and handed it to him.

Sam’s jaw clenched as he held it in his fingers.

Back when things were much simpler and less messed up, he remembers you used this very bottle to carry around this fancy facial toner that you claimed you couldn’t live without, and now.

With a crunch audible to both hunters, Sam’s hand closed into a fist crushing the bottle to pieces.

He stayed still for a whole minute that felt like a lifetime to you.

“ _Sam_ …” you started and then trailed off with even more guilty tears spilling out.

Upon hearing your voice so defeated and small and then seeing the tears, his face softened several degrees. You rarely cried and he knew exactly how she felt.

Sam immediately turned the faucet on and washed away the demon blood mixed in with his own through the tiny cuts the glass made in his palm, as well as the glass.

Then he turned to you who was frozen and still had dried blood on your lips and teeth.

The younger Winchester’s heart broke at the sight, “Hey. It’s gonna be okay,” he found himself soothing you before wrapping his arms around you, resting his chin on the top of your head. 

You continued to silently cry with eyes closed as you tensed in his arms.

“I’ve got you, Y/N. Always. No matter what. We’ll figure it out- we always do.” Sam reassured and gently ran his hands up and down your shoulders.

You instantly relaxed into his embrace and returned it, wrapping your arms around his waist.

“Seriously? You couldn’t have this chick flick moment outside? Friggin’ light woke me up.” Dean entered the bathroom annoyed, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes.

You were rigid in Sam’s arms, terrified of how Dean will take this news.

Sam turned around with you still holding on to him and faced Dean.

“What’s goin’ on?” the older brother asked with his bright green eyes confused and brows raised.

**Author's Note:**

> Fanfic Tumblr: @Quackofletters  
> Personal Tumblr: @Nostalgic-uncertainty


End file.
